On Bar Sluts

You realize once again: She’s Drunk

Across the Nordic countries, girls start their night out with coffee at home, alcohol in the bars, then energy drinks on the streets. By 0100 hrs they become tired of being too picky, so they become a mix of aggressive man-hunters with drooling speech, or have sobered up enough to call up a taxi to go home and dildo themselves to sleep.

Granted, alcohol lowers women’s inhibitions, makes it easier for them to open their legs, and for men to get laid. But

No sensible man is going to stay long, around a woman whose best friend is alcohol.

Thus by the time these women run out on their youth, they wonder why guys only just wanted to fuck, then leave. And now with increasing trend of rape allegations after drunken sex, I won’t be surprised in the future if it becomes an ‘unwritten code’ that guys refuse to even talk to any woman who has been served alcohol that night. Not to mention,

Females who regularly consume alcohol have a straight foot on the biological pedal.

At neck-breaking speed they hit The Wall, and the damaging effects from the crash are so great, besides emotional and psychological, that it starts taking twice the normal time to apply the facial make-up to hide the effects, and pretend to be drama-free.

You see them in their 30’s, advertising themselves like re-painted used cars, trying to attract and tie down a simp. They sell him the usual victim line of “Well, I was young and didn’t know any better.” Then the sucker falls for their manipulation, and he becomes Captain Save-a-Hoe.

Soon enough, the fool will be paying mortgages to keep the Emotional Wreck,

• with a worn out speedometer,
• plenty of cock mileage,
• a gear lever that can’t even make a sandwich,
• saggy airbags,
• an infested hollowed out trunk with rusty tubes and pipes,
• blurry mirrors,
• a steering wheel that cannot be controlled,
• with a loud engine that won’t shut the fuck up,
• highway breakdown whenever you tap her brakes to slow her down,
• a flat uncomfortable seat,
• a heater that doesn’t warm up when you are going through cold times in life,
• and the bonus? A ventilation system that backs up all your faults to vent them out later in your face.

And lest I forget, before taking that drunken slut out of the car dump, you might want to look at the Insurance Agreement; paragraph 7 contains premium information for when you get cuckolded from behind. …. (Happy driving, sir).